When I worked at that Starbucks across from Lehman Brothers on 49th, the day trader scrotes that came in every day would always paw the "impulse items" at the registers- gift cards, little butter cookies, CDs, whatever. Part of an employee's responsibilities before they go on break is to cross around to the front of the register and wipe the finger prints off all that shit with a bar rag, which is good to know if you're buying little impulse butter cookies at the register in a Manhattan Starbucks.
For a time, Starbucks carried and sold this Jimi Hendrix compilation, a CD we were to display alongside the company's latest Hear Music compilation featuring Jason Mraz covering Leonard Cohen or some such crap at the register, or "POS"- point of sale. Without fail, every ten minutes or so, some (usually male) business jerk would reach the register, pick up the CD, and say something to the effect of "Heyhey, JIMI!", like he was finding an old friend.
It's not my place to say that 35 year old Lehman Brothers employees aren't allowed to like Jimi Hendrix. (They're not, but it's not my place to say it.) One day though, as I was crouched down in front of my POS, straightening bottles of Ethos water, I watched one of these guys knowingly take this Hendrix CD casually slip it into his shoulder bag. This man, easily making upwards of $60K a year, was shoplifting an $11 CD from a coffee store. I was incredulous- not because HOW DARE YOU SHOPLIFT FROM THE STARBUCKS CORPORATION GOOD SIR, but it struck as the most pitiful "fuck the system" move I'd seen since my friend Matt ruined his perfectly good Taurus sedan by spray painting all over it back in high school, making it a beacon to local law enforcement.
I didn't confront the guy, or tell on him, but I wish to this day that I'd grabbed his bag and snatched the compilation away, screaming "THAT'S NOT FOR YOU. JIMI HENDRIX IS NOT FOR YOU". You work at Lehman Brothers, so you are not allowed to shoplift Jimi Hendrix CDs as petty rebellion. Shoplifting Jimi Hendrix CDs from Starbucks is the job of the disillusioned 20 year old Starbucks employee, so he has something to listen to when he goes back home to drink cough syrup in his $400 a month hide-a-bed.
Nu school mash clazzix via TimG.
Jay Z vs. Jimi Hendrix "Voodoo Problems" (TimG Mash)
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4 comments:
That was the dumbest post, filled with an overwhelming amount of short sighted arrogance and a pitiful grasping of any meaningful insight.
There is no difference between stealing 11 million dollars, or 11 dollars, or 11 songs of someones blog. Oh, but since someone wears a suit and tie to afford to have a family, a house, and a vacation once a year... that must mean that they are themselves just a pathetic cog in a system and deserve nothing more than that.
Seriously, You worked at Starbucks. Go put a bent quarter into a meter and pretend you're doing something different.
Yes, actually. Because people deserve nothing more than the paths they choose for themselves. Anybody burdened by their own value system badly needs to re-assess what exactly they want from life, and why.
It's not the dictatorship of the proletariat, Anonymous MP3 blog troll- It's an anecdote about a jerk customer. Have fun at work this week!
Great post... "fool's paradise" is obv an aspiring trader scrote.
If anyone is interested in a Jimi cover that rocks, i saw Malina Moye play Foxey Lady lefty/upside down (like Hendrix) on her fender in Atlantic City w-robin thicke. Damn sexy. It's on itunes under 'sexxy man' and it rocks.
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