She's fantastic; Made of plastic.

Today's am.fm.pm mixtape was compiled by Dr. Ted Lawson, creator of United Robotronics Project V.I.C.I.- aka Vicky Lawson. UR shut down the plant a few years back, and without work, Ted now spends his days watching television. Project V.I.C.I. has begun to act out, perhaps, he hypothesizes, as part of some cyborg adolescence. Exasperated by the antics of his surrogate robot daughter, he has taken to drinking alone in the shed. Small wonder.

Vicky, you will wipe off that lipstick right this instant and rake that Goddamn yard. I don't care if you've got a date. No, I don't care. Do you have any idea the kind of man you attract, Vicky? Perverts. You attract perverts because you have the body of a ten year old. No, they don't know that you're 26. No. BECAUSE IT SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIME, GODDAMMIT. How many times are we going to have this talk? How many times are you going to make me apologize for the breast thing? I'm sorry, alright? Call it short sightedness if you want, but I have apologized a thousand times over. I've got enough problems without you laying this guilt shit on me time and again, alright?

I didn't mean to snap at you there. You uh, I guess you don't have to rake the yard. Can you take care of the sink though? The dishes? Can we agree on the dishes? Good. You can keep the lipstick on too. Just do the dishes. And put some grease on it.

No Vicky, we don't Crisc- VICKY! Son of bitch, when I say "put some grease on it", that doesn't mean to Crisco the sponge. Jesus Christ, I swear, I- yes. Yes, I know you name is not Jesus. Yes Vicky. Your name is Vicky.

I'm not budging on the date. Yes, I am totally serious. Because it's creepy. Yes Vicky, it is. No, it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that you're a robot. It's justNO I HAVE NOT BEEN DRINKING IN THE SHED.

Maybe I've expected too much from you. Only real girls grow up.

Small Wonder Theme Song

DJ Medhi "Lucky Girl"

ElBarto & LiamB "How Will I Know (Glitch Mix)" (Whitney Houston vs. DJ Battery Brain vs. Daft Punk)

Party Ben "The Way I Keep Me Hangin' On" (Timbaland vs. The Supremes)

Junior Jack "Stupid Disco"

Dunproofin' "Sayin' Somethin' Toxic" (Britney Spears vs. The Velvettes)

Warren & Vicki "Nerd Crush" (Small Wonder Audio Clip)

King.of.Pants "Glamorous Thrill (Moustache Mix)" (Michael Jackson vs. Fergie)

Lady Sovereign "Blah Blah"

ElBarto & LiamB "Careful Boyz" (M.I.A. vs. Hot Chip)

Ladytron "Playgirl"

Marla & Vicki "DigiDarling" (Small Wonder Audio Clip)

Goldfrapp "Train"

King.of.Pants "Lip Gloss is a Battlefield" (Lil' Mama vs. Pat Benetar)