Cream in your coffee, Coffee in your moustache.

Today's am.fm.pm mixtape has been prepared by Lt. Steve Aiello, Queens PD. His wife Marjorie makes one hell of a veal parmesean, and if you're lucky, you can try some of his leftovers. Welcome to the brotherhood.

Yeah kid, everybody's first few days are strange. The key to this job is attitude. You've got to have a positive attitude, you know? I remember Fall, 1979. I was a doe-eyed dipshit right out of the academy, and I couldn't wait for some action. You wanna know my first day? It was in October, the day His Holiness the Pope came to visit Shea Stadium. Oh, I was frothing at the bit for a gig like that, you know?

They put me on subway duty. Sure, I was mad at first. Figured I'd miss all the good stuff, you know?

I arrested two hundred and fourteen people that day. Thirty three point three percent caucasian, thirty three point three percent colored, and thirty three point three percent "other". Even stats clear across the board, and a sixty percent conviction rate. And I tell you, it's all thanks to a good attitude. This job, this life, it's all just what you make of it.

There were some Asians too, but this was the seventies, so they went under "other".

Those were the good old days, you know? Just me and Old Beauregard. He was my mutt, a real good dog. Called him Beauregard to give him a little bit of class, you know? I tell ya, that dog had the sharpest nose for smack that this city has ever seen.

I arrested a dog once. Oh, sure, the college type liberatti were all over me on that one, but I tell ya: that dog was running one of the most sophisticated check washing operations this city has ever seen. How you feeling about a Roast Beef hero right about now?

Earth, Wind, and Fire "In The Stone"

Kanye West "Champion"

Steely Dan "Kid Charlemagne"

Ben Folds "Kops"

Mike Post "Theme from Hill Street Blues"

The Delfonics "Ready or Not Here I Come (Can't Hide From Love)"

Quincy Jones "Killer Joe"

Atlanic Starr "Second to None"

Ann Peebles "I Can't Stand The Rain"

The Lovin' Spoonful "Summer in the City"

Todd Rundgren "We Gotta Get You A Woman"

Jose Felliciano "California Dreaming"